how to face fears in life
Resilience is a set of skills that will help you through adversity and uncertain times. Being flexible, able to adapt without losing sight of what is important to you and keeping a positive mindset is the pay-off of resilience.
Fear is the acronym for Future Expectations Appearing Real. In other words, fantasy is perceived as reality. Byproducts of fear are feeling paralysed, not being able to make decisions as rational thinking is blocked and preventing you from seeing the total picture. In the face of adversity, fear eats away your resilience. For some tips on how to deal with Covid stress, click here.
Fear and resilience bite each other
Fear only serves a purpose when it is connected with danger, because it warns you, so you are able to keep yourself safe.
A great way of conquering fear is confronting yourself with all possible scenarios that are connected with it. ‘What if’ is the question that evokes the fear, but answering that question will offer a reality check and help you to understand that one way or another you will be able to deal with it. ‘What if’ I lose my job? Well, then you have to find another. ‘What if’ that doesn’t happen? Well, then maybe change careers. ‘What if’ I don’t earn enough? Well, then I have to sell the car. ‘What if’ I don’t have a car? Well, then I walk more. And so it goes on. The picture painted by the answers is usually less dramatic than the fear itself. It shows you where you could take control and makes you realise what the worst is that could happen. Which often is something you can deal with.
Gradual exposure
Another way of dealing with fear is gradually to expose yourself to the subject of fear. ‘Exposure therapy’ is often used in CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy), which helps you change the associations with a particular stimulus. Instead of fear, you will start to build up trust.
In the current Covic climate, it is important to build resilience and not allow yourself to be more affected than you have to. Remind yourself that if you think differently you will create a different experience.
If you struggle, why not book a free coaching session with life coach Mariette to build confidence and get some tips? Book here.
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