Have you ever come across a narcissistic salesperson? One that doesn’t let you go?
Who came up with another reason why you should buy?
And who didn’t really listen to what you had to say? But went on and on and on and on…
And maybe you even bought from them.
Got so fed up that you just wanted the process to end.
Or you started to believe what they kept on repeating to you.
The narcissist wants to win
Anyway, you met someone who wanted to win. And they did through perseverance, one-sided information and conviction that they were absolutely right.
For a real narcissist, life is all about winning. Winning an argument, getting their way or winning the sale. And they never give up.
Underneath their arrogance hides a fragile ego, a huge insecurity issue that usually stems from their early life. Some people address their insecurity by getting therapy or coaching, others face it by setting themselves challenges, but narcissists have chosen to hide it and pretend it isn’t there. As a consequence they will feel the fear for exposure and all their actions are aimed at masking their real self. They choose the persona of the confident, even cocky ‘know it all’. Feeling in the background that ongoing fear that they are going to be found out.
It makes the narcissist live on the edge at all times.
It also makes them look for opportunities to show the world that they are not insecure. Opportunities where they can show they are a winner. Most narcissists love debates because they can end up with the victory. They also love going out for dinner and put the waitress down, so they can feel the top dog and will experience a victorious feeling. And when they are in a selling position, they will go for ‘the kill’, another word for the sale. Again, to feel the winner.
What helps the narcissistic salesperson is that they don’t really care about the buyer. They are only interested in their own success, their glory and how others will see them.
Note, not everyone who is keen on winning is a narcissist. But if the ‘winner’ also shows characteristics that refer to having a grandiose sense of self, being manipulative and controlling, lacking empathy and emotions and demanding attention and adoration, it is very likely we are talking about someone with a Narcissistic Personality Disorder.
Have a narcissist in your life and struggling? Why not join the facebook group: Narcissism, from victim to surviving to thriving.