finding it difficult to change

Finding it difficult to change

‘The only constant in life is change’.

(Heraclitus, a Greek philosopher)

Anxiety, sadness and pressure are all part of the process of change and offer to most of us a real challenge. We want to find happiness and peace and that does not go well with the stresses, which come with change.

But, life is a process of continuous change. We should be used to it by it now, you would think, but there are reasons why most people struggle and it is all about emotions.

Three main feelings that are preventing us from celebrating change are:

1. Anxiety

Change means entering unknown territory. Not knowing means no control and that is stressful. It is preferable to stay in a known but unhappy situation than to step in the void of ‘not knowing’. This has been given as one of the reasons that it is so hard for women to leave a situation of domestic violence.

2. Sadness

Change relates to loss and loss creates sadness, which we most try to avoid…. Every new opportunity or situation means we leave something behind. Even when it is something bad… The emotional process we have to go through is one of bereavement. Even though ‘when one door closes, another one opens’.

3. Pressure to act

New situations require effort. We need to adjust and make it work. If we don’t put the effort in,  we get stuck in either the sadness or the anxiety. And with human’s natural tendency to look for the easy option, change is tiring or inconvenient.

A personal example of change

To continue with the same thing, I had to make changes

As I am getting older, my body doesn’t respond the way it used to. I love running but got minor injuries regularly. The only way to keep in the running circuit was to change my regime: less running and instead of spinning to strengthen the old muscles and Pilates to stretch them. And guess what, I can still run and – touch wood – no injuries so far.

The emotional process touched on anxiety about injuries, the confrontation on losing my youth creates anxiety and sadness, and if I want to enjoy what I used to do, I can feel the pressure to act.

One easy way to ease anxiety is SMS.

If you are resisting change or having difficulty with change, why not get in touch for a free coaching session? Book here.