The difference between self-love and self-care
Self-love vs self-care Agnes was not happy. Over the years she had read loads of self-help books – working on her ‘shelf’-development – and also went through a few therapists. She knew exactly what she needed. It was loving herself. The problem was that she didn’t...
Why I wrote ‘From Victim to Victor’
Book on overcoming narcissism On 21 June 2020 (solstice), I launched my book ‘From Victim to Victor’, the narcissism survival guide. And below I started my speech by explaining what the bird on the cover symbolized for me: freedom. ‘The bird in the cage has managed to...
How to change a negative mindset into a positive one
How to change your mindset from negative to positive Negativity is a low vibrational energy. It doesn’t contribute to happiness, lightness and joy. How can you spot negativity? Last week I overheard a conversation from my neighbour’s balcony between two friends, Penny...
Emotional old pain that hits between the eyes
Are you sometimes hit by surprise? Do you think ‘I thought I was over this’? Are you familiar with the pain? Lars was a lovely 39 years old man, who loved his job as a manager and was loved and supported by his team. He had a positive attitude and was an excellent...
I left my boyfriend this week and have already replaced him
Life surprises Life is full of surprises and no one could have imagined what is currently happening with the corona animal. That beast that has the power to turn our lives upside down. It is tough. For everyone in different ways. You can plan and organize, but when...
The art of goal setting: paralysing, inspiring, irritating or helpful?
Goal setting has proven to help people to achieve more. At the start of a new decade (hooray and how scary how time flies) it makes sense to a lot of people to spend some time on goal setting. The question is how helpful that is. Does it expand your horizon, invite...
Happiness is like a pendulum, swinging between the emotional ups and the downs
Our emotions are continuously moving, shifting and swinging. And the same for our happiness levels. As Einstein said: ‘The only constant in life is change’. If you compare your emotional movements with a pendulum, then you will understand that the higher it swings...
Anti-ageing or pro-ageing?
Is age a number, a mindset or a downhill journey? Do you hate getting older? Do you dread reaching your next decade (30-40-50-60-70)? Do you never tell others how old you are? Recently I attended a meeting where Tricia Cusden was the speaker. She started a new...
Follow your dreams – there always is a way
This week I met two people who talked about their dreams. Being an artist is my mission Elsa was very sad as ‘life got in the way’ of her dreams quite dramatically and she was convinced her dreams could not come true….. Elsa who is 39 wanted to be an artist all her...
Note to self – make sure it’s lovely and lovable
As an experienced life coach, I know that one of the most common sources of unhappiness is the lack of self-love. From that comes lack of self-care, putting others first, living on empty, becoming unauthentic, feeling lost in life, low confidence and more. Most people...
When talking isn’t a solution for your relationship issues – actions speak louder than words
You have been talking and talking but it hasn't solved your relationship issue. It feels as if there is no change at all. And you feel desperate. Is it time for action, as you know, actions speak louder than words? Sometimes. Do you argue about the same thing time and...
Create your happiness through acts of kindness
‘Treat everyone with politeness and kindness, not because they are nice, but because you are’ – Roy Bennett Most mornings I leave the house with the intention to do a few acts of kindness during the school run. That is a bit cheating as it is so easy. Give way to a...
From a full nest to an empty one – empty nest syndrome
You long for a baby and get pregnant. Next step: giving birth. For most women, the process is an intense experience with an incredible reward: a baby boy or girl or sometimes even more than one. From then on, you focus on providing basic needs: clean nappies,...
Why is change so difficult? Three reasons
'The only constant in life is change'. (Heraclitus, a Greek philosopher) Anxiety, sadness and pressure are all part of the process of change and offer to most of us a real challenge. We want to find happiness and peace and that does not go well with the stresses,...
Decluttering is an art
Best decluttering tips Decluttering is an emotional process. That is why most of us find it hard. Decluttering results in peace and quiet: in your house, your cupboard, your car and ultimately in your mind. It is not just about throwing stuff away, getting rid of...
7 signs you are developing an eating disorder
Do you start new diets all the time? Are you not happy with your body? Do you wonder if your behaviour around food is ‘normal’? Is food and weight loss a big thing in your life? These questions can all point towards the development of an eating disorder. As an...
Escape the cage of age – happy retirement
Fear of retirement And create the life you are meant to live….. Are you similar to Sally or John? Sally is about to retire. Because she has been busy all her life with work, raising a family and looking after her husband, she fears the empty hours and is not sure what...
The cage of age or intelligent ageing?
Who is jumping for joy at the idea of getting older? Who is feeling some fear? And who wants to be an ostrich and pretend it is not going to happen? Most people are ambivalent about getting older. There is the ‘I feel more myself, I am more comfortable saying no and I...
Language, reveals your secrets without you telling…..
It is the carrier of your subconscious I spoke to a lady who kept on telling me a few times in the conversation that she was a very positive person. At the end I challenged her, mentioning how often she had used the words difficult, impossible and totally wrong which,...
Why saying thank you is not good enough – the art of gratitude
‘If you’ve forgotten the language of gratitude, you’ll never be on speaking terms with happiness.’ The simple act of feeling (!) grateful and expressing it has a strong impact on health, well-being and relationships. A series of recent studies have found positive...
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